There is a point at which you just need to shut up. I’m sorry, but we don’t want to hear you whine about the same problem over and over. Yes, everyone deserves an amount of “listen but don’t help” time, but, at the same time, you can’t simply do it forever about the same things repeatedly without people growing tired of it. There are plenty of issues in the world that need to be talked about, and I value hearing everyone’s opinions on different topics. At the same time, saying “I don’t like this food” repeatedly is uninspired. That’s not going to spark conversation, and it sure as heck isn’t going to spark results.
I won’t lie, people need to focus on strengthening their problem-solving skills. Upon arriving at Illinois Institute of Technology, I realized that some people lack logical problem-solving skills. As a teaching assistant, I have further developed an understanding of the fact that many students don’t bother to find a solution on their own before asking a question (I can’t emphasize enough the number of students who have asked me questions that were answered on the first page of the syllabus). Problem solving is a SKILL that you need to develop over time, but it’s not an excuse to rely on others to fix things for you.
One of the most infuriating things I’ve encountered is people who refuse to take the advice that others provide and continue to complain. There’s a huge difference between trying and failing to fix a problem and not trying to solve the issue but continuing to yap about it. I do NOT want to hear you complain about your professor not posting the homework on time if you haven’t once tried emailing them about the issue. I do NOT want to listen to you whine about not knowing how to cook when you haven’t done an ounce of research. I do NOT want to deal with the non-stop complaints about having no money when you haven’t even considered finding a job. And PLEASE stop talking about needing help when you actively tell us over and over that you refuse to consider going to therapy.
The amount of criticism towards different organizations on campus is prevalent over different social media platforms (Discord, Instagram, Fizz, etc.), but few have tried to actually be part of the solution. I know I didn’t want to join the Student Government Association (SGA), so I chose to stop commenting on repetitive, bland, and generic criticisms towards the organization. When I do have a complaint, I turn to those that have connections with the organization and try to come up with possible solutions. Spreading negativity through channels that are accessible to outside people will just further the negative reputation of the organization. Not only this, but social media is PUBLIC, something that future employers can find and generate an opinion about you. As a child of professors that are responsible for admitting students and hiring PHD students and postdocs, you can learn a lot from a simple Google search, and that first page of results are going to show exactly how positive or negative of a person you are. I am all for free speech, but you need to know criticism without addressing a possible solution further proves your inability to problem solve.
I believe in freedom of speech and I believe that everyone deserves to be heard, but I hope that you will keep in mind that not everything needs to be shared with the world. Especially if it’s over and over and over again.