As many know, the Illinois Institute of Technology’s very own College of Architecture (CoA) has been facing many challenges, specifically with the famous Crown Hall. Not only do they have a bird-killing problem, but they have many, many unwanted visitors in a variety of species (humans being the worst). Additionally, there are many complaints with the overall heating and cooling of the building as well; it’s just a giant glass box specifically designed to set students on fire the same way many kids set ants on fire with magnifying glasses.
For the first time in all of architectural history, the CoA has developed a solution that will fix all of these problems at once: a large, dome-like plastic structure that encloses Crown Hall, pumped, of course, with fresh, breathable air.
Many concerns were raised by the Mies van der Rohe Society: no damage or changes can be made to Crown Hall, how will the students fare, and how will people get in and out of the building?
Well, the CoA has solved all of these problems at once. For one, the dome, also known as the “CoA Bubble”, does not touch Crown Hall at all. In fact, it protects it from further damage from environmental causes. The students, of course, will be safer than they were before. Nobody can break in, and the air will always be fresh, offsetting the body odor that wafts off of the students who haven’t showered since the last time they slept. As for getting in and out… well, most students don’t leave Crown Hall anyway, so that isn’t even a concern that has to be addressed. For the staff who have actual lives and families, there will be a new, secret tunnel that allows grown-ups (i.e., only the faculty and staff) to pass through. However, the current tunnel proposal has yet to be approved by the Mies van der Rohe Society, as it would require minor changes to Crown Hall, so it’s not currently in the works in the physical sense.
